Sunday, October 24, 2010

A story about what a grandpa should be.

My dad was always the quiet, reserved soul. He loved us kids, that I do know. But he had the gruff exterior that made it hard for him to show emotions. {Iam sure there are those out there, who know atleast one person who matches these characteristics.}

And then something wonderful happend. Something I never imagined. My dad became a grandpa. We've all heard it. "Things become alot more relaxed when you are a grandparent." My dad is living proof of this. He would do anything for his grandchildren. He takes them on tractor rides. He pushes them up and down the driveway on the wheelbarrow. He gives them far too many "treats," and candies.

Before I was born, my father fantasized about having a daddies girl. Sadly, that just wasn't the case. I was a momma's girl through and through. That doesn't mean he didn't treat me any less of a daddies girl, even though I didn't return the favor. Then Sarah was born. She was the first girl in the family. My brother had two boys, and after Sarah I went on to have two boys. My dad has played barbies.... my dad has played tea party... my dad has painted toes and had his toes painted. {Yes he is that good!}

He loves his "Nikki." {"Nikki" came from her middle name Nicole, and my dad is netorious for pet names.}  Not to say he doesn't love the boys that much as well... but I believe there is something magical about him getting a second chance with his daughters, daughter.

Savannah, was going to bring even more girly delight into my dad's grandparenting years. Although he would never admit it, he showed signs throughout my pregnancy that he was excited. His little "Samantha."

On that last night headed down to Sacramento, my dad had only one request. If she had to go that night, he asked that she be baptised. It was important to him. She was important to him.

As I've said before Savannah was baptised that night before we held her for the last time. After she had passed and we placed her back into the doctors arms, I asked where they were taking her that night. They told me they would take her down stairs to the morgue. I cried. What an awful, cold name. Morgue. I asked how she would get home. The doctor told me that once I made arrangement at the funeral home, they would drive down and bring her back. Still dreadful. Savannah didn't know those people. Where they going to treat her as the beautiful baby that she was, and is? I didn't like it, but I had no choice. 

Little did I know, that as we drove home that night my dad was going to yet again, step in and save the day. He is a retired Captin of the California Highway Patrol, so as you can imagine, he knows alot of people. He called an old friend, whom used to be a motitian. Then he proceeded to call Allen and Dahl funeral home and make arrangements. In the two and a half hours it took for us to make the drive home, my father had already arranged to be the one whom brought Savannah home. I don't know how he did it, but I didn't ask. I didn't need to know. Savannah would be in safe hands.

The next morning, Jim Allen from the funeral home, met my dad and Van, {the old friend} at my house to hand off the legal paperwork needed to hand over custody of a body and bring them back. And let me tell you there was a lot of paperwork. My dad then asked for one of her blankets. Instead of handing over the polka dot blanket she had with her in the hospital, I gave him the pink blanket that him and my mom had bought for her. It had a little giraffe in the bottom corner. There was no way I would part with the other one. It still smelled like her. 

After they had left, I asked my mother, "she isn't going to have to ride home in a body bag is she?" My mom nodded sadly, "yes, I think she will." I tried to hold back tears. "Then why did dad ask for her blanket?" My mom told me she didn't know. I hated that as well. A body bag. Another awful word.

That evening when my dad finally made it back and dropped Savannah off at the funeral home, he called to tell us the events of the day. UC Davis attorney had to get involved. There was more paperwork than he ever imagined. But he filled it out. For her. Savannah didn't ride home in a body bag. Her grandpa delicatly wrapped her precious body in her pink giraffe blanket. Savannah rode cradled in the backseat of the car. Savannah and Grandpa finally got to meet.

My dad has done many things for me over the years of my life. But because my daddy went to the ends of the earth for my deceased babygirl, I know there isn't anything I can ever say or do to repay him for nurturing her body back home to her mommy. I have eternal love and gratitude for him.

It was a journey that Samantha, and Grandpa had to make together.
She will always be her Grandpa's Girl.


Stacey said...

That is so beautiful and touching. Savannah "Samantha" has the best grandpa ever. I can only imagine how hard that was on your dad but I believe he knew he had to do it for his granddaughter. To make sure that she was well taken care of and was not treated like just another deceased baby another day.
I worried about when Jaleel was taken away in his body bag ;-( I wanted them to put him in his carseat. I worried he would be bouncing around in the back seat. OMG I hope they put him in the back seat. Of course the coroner reassured me he had 4 children he would take care of him but was he really taken care of.
I am so glad you dad did this for his daughter and his granddaughter!!! Such love he had for his Savannah, a love that I know she feels even all the way in Heaven

Serenity's Mommy said...

The hospital Serenity passed away at gave us the option of bringing her to the funeral home ourselves. Oh how I wish I had.

I know she was well taken care of though, because the guy my BF works for owns the funeral home we went with, and his wife runs it.

I was worried if something happened, and we got pulled over, there would be a lot of questions as to WHY we had our "dead baby" in the car with us.

I do wish I would have gotten to spend that extra 2 hours with her though.

I am so glad your daddy got to take such good care of her. In a sense it warms my heart that he got to do that. But it also tears me up, that it was even an option. But that all goes back to my belief that NOBODY should have to know the pain of loosing a child, or grandchild.

Wendi@Every Day Miracles said...

That is one of the sweetest things I have ever heard. What a wonderful daddy/grandpa!

Jersey Girl in Louisiana said...

Tears! Amazing post.

Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting said...

How beautiful is that! {tears}

John and Allie Fields said...

I think she may have the sweetest grandpa ever!

Charis said...

wow. that made be cry like crazy. you have an amazing dad.. though he may be quiet and not a man of many words, as they always say, "actions REALLY DO speak louder than words."

Tina said...

Dear Megan,

I don't have any words to say. I am just crying here. What a beautiful thing for both Savannah and yourself. Oh what Love he has for you and your children.

In Christ's Love & prayers
Sis in Christ

Janey981 said...

What a beautiful gesture of love for the whole family, but especially for Savannah.

nh said...

What a lovely story - something that you will always treasure.

Tiara said...

Having lost my own Dad & having been a Daddy's Girl, this post had me sobbing. I am sorry your Savannah couldn't grow up with such a wonderful Grandpa.

S said...

What a beautiful act of love. I love grandfathers and their girls. Hugs and love.

Princess Jo said...

Beautiful, even though it makes me cry. :-)


Tiffany said...

wow. how amazing. this post leaves me breathless.

Brave IVF Girl said...

Here from Creme de la Creme.

Beautiful story. I'm crying.

Brave IVF Girl said...

Here from Creme de la Creme.

Beautiful story. I'm crying.

Anonymous said...

I'm humbled and stilled by your dad and his profound acts of love for you and Savannah. Beautiful.

Here from the Creme.

a Field of dreams said...

Beautiful post. I pictured my own dads face as i read your story and could see how similar they are in character yet so soft deep in their soul. Your father loves you and 'Samantha' very much.

Here from the Creme.

Tigger said...

Here from Creme:

What a powerful post about love! I'm so glad you have a daddy like this, and that Savannah had a grandpa like this! I can't imagine my own dad doing anything even remotely similar - your dad astounds me.

Lut C. said...

A very moving post, I have no words.

I'm sorry for your devastating loss.

(Arrived from the Crème de la Crème list)

Chronic Contemplations said...

Tears streamed down my face as I read this. What a beautiful story of love. I'm so truly sorry that there was ever a reason for your father to do this for his precious granddaughter.

Sara said...

Here from the creme de la creme.

This story is hauntingly beautiful. I am SO sorry that you all had to suffer such an incredible loss, but I'm glad that your dad came through for you and for Savannah in such an important way.

Tanya said...

Here from creme...I am so sorry for your loss. Your father sounds like the most wonderful man and that was such a huge act of love both for your daughter and you. Take care.

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