Thursday, March 10, 2011

Be my baby.

In case you have missed this single father's popular youtube video... tonight seeing yet another video of this admirable daddy singing with his precious daughter did in fact make my heart ache. We have a tendency, especially as the mother, to forget that when our babies die, our husbands truly loose something as well. Daddies hearts break in the same way as mommies... they just express things a little differently.

So when you watch this video, whether you have lost a baby or not, please try and look at the love this father has for his daughter. You can see it radiating from both him... and her.... And imagine the pain one must feel to never have a chance to sing duets side by side...

Sarah, is always singing.

I would like to picture Koady and Savannah singing
this song side by side as well...

"Be My Baby."
-The Ronettes
{Jorge & Alexa Narvaez}

{Pause the Playlist on the 
side before watching!!!}



Exactly how my husband has felt since our son died...the are the "second-class grievers" here is a poem I found that I LOVE:

It must be very difficult to be a man in grief
Since "men don't cry" and "men are strong" no tears can bring relief.

It must be very difficult to stand up to the test
And field calls and visitors so she can get some rest

They always ask if shes alright and whats shes going through
But seldom take his hand and ask "my friend but how are you?"

He hears her crying in the night and thinks his heart will break
He drys his tears and comforts her but "stays strong" for her sake

It must be very difficult to start each day anew
And try to be so very brave he lost his baby too


Cally said...

This reminds me of an experience I had a couple of months ago.

Shane and I were eating at the Golden Corral, when a man in a suit and tie walked in and sat in the booth behind us, with his daughter (no more than 5 years old) wearing the cutest little dress. Just the two of them. From where I was sitting, I was facing them. I had to fight to hold back tears, thinking to myself the whole time..

Shane will never get to experience this type of daddy/daughter day/dinner with Serenity.

It was so sweet, but in another sense it broke my heart- for Shane. I often wonder if Shane felt the same way about it. I realize all the things I am going to miss out on by being her mother, but it takes seeing things like that to realize HE may have the same feelings about certain circumstances like that. I mean, if it broke my heart like that, I can't imagine how he feels. Sometimes I wish he would just talk to me, and tell me what HIS triggers are. Mine are pretty apparent. His are hidden under layers, like an onion. (Shrek reference- Shane's fave cartoon movie, because he says he looks like Shrek. HA!) I hate to break it to him, but we are not living in the 1800's. It's not taboo anymore to grieve the loss of a child.