The day before Valentines, my husband and I dropped our little ones off at my mother-in-laws house for our pre-v. day evening. Her boyfriend had his son, daughter-in-law, and two grandkids at their house visiting from the coast.
This couple had a baby boy a few months before Savannah was born. Knowing that they were going to be there, I tried to prepare my mind to be in the presence of a baby, "Savannah's age."
When we pulled into the driveway, a couple was rocking on the porch swing. There in the woman's arms was a baby boy. For a moment in my mind, I thought to myself, "I was thinking of the wrong couple."
Here was this baby. No longer the tiny baby I was expecting to encounter. Honestly, I cannot explain to you why. WHY was I thinking their baby boy would still be a newborn? Why was I expecting to see an infant. Not a teething, sitting up, chubby, baby.
Why do I have the forever eight day old baby? Why do I have the baby whom will never outgrow her tubs of preemie sized outfits? Why do I assume that baby's born around the same time as Savannah, won't grow up, get bigger, and develop into little people.
They do. Obviously, I don't truly mean that in the way it sounds. Let me explain. In all honestly...
I wished for a newborn baby, cradled in his mothers arms that afternoon. The same age as Savannah, but still offering the precious newborn look, that was suddenly gone from our lives. I refuse to believe that in six short days, Savannah would be six months old. She wouldn't look at all like she did, the day she was born. She would have her own personality, and her own likes and dislikes. I would already be missing that tiny, newborn phase.... I am so lucky. My baby WILL be that small forever.
Sigh, will I ever get that chance again?
5 comments:
I never really thought about it but yes, my earthly image of Savannah is that of a newborn. So precious, tender and fragile. However, my heavenly image of her is quite different. She's young, playful and innocent. Wrapped up in all the goodness that surrounds her.
I am sorry ;-(
^^Savannah^^ is such a beautiful angel!! I too picture my little angel guy like i last saw him,so tiny, but then i also picture him as an older angel now in heaven showing all the new little angels around and having boyish fun. I so hope that is true ;)
I was in a due date group with other mothers for my daughter Carleigh. All of their babes will be turning 2 here soon. It's hard to grasp that Carleigh would look like them and be doing the things that they do b/c she is forever frozen as a baby in my mind.
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